Tube Red
Posted in Uncategorized on 09/06/2009 05:11 am by adminTube Red
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“Hello, is Al Coholic there?” “Why you yellow rat bastard!!!” The True Story behind the Tube Bar Prank Calls
This is a modern tragicomedy, a love-hate story between three grown men (and occasionally their mothers), a story also known as the Tube Bar prank calls.
The tale begins somewhere in the 70’s with Jim Davidson and John Elmo, a couple of guys with too much free time on their hands. The two young men picked up the phone and called the Tube Bar in Jersey. Louis “Red” Deutsch, the bar’s owner, picked up the phone, said “hello” and before he even had a chance to think, he was calling for Joe, “Joe Mama.” The rest is history.
This great love affair owes much to Red, and his distinctive, rugged voice. Red has the voice of a man who eats stones and dirt for breakfast. Red would pick up the phone again and again, only to find him self calling for Al Kaseltzer. Hugh Jass, Ben Dover and even Moe Lester… Yes, the Bum Bar Bastards (BBB) were really mean.
Red would call out the names, some say he was unaware, some say he played along. Anyway, he did it with great charm, shouting at the prankster with profanity and obscene sexual references involving the caller’s mother and a certain “yellow rat bastard.” Here’s a sample, but watch out! It includes Red’s explicit language:
Red: Why you yellow rat bastard, you motherf%$!@&. Why don’t you come over and meet me face to face, you mother… I’ll meet you wherever you want.
BBB: That’s what I want.
Red: Where are you? I’ll come right over.
BBB: You son of a @#$%!!
Red: You sonova%$@#, you mother%$@#$!
BBB: I’ll come down there.
Red: You sonova$#@!%, I’ll cut your belly open!
BBB: You yellow bastard.
Red: Why you lousy mother… You’ll #@$% your own mother, you son of!!!
Indeed, Red is an endangered specie. He comes from a time when men where men and used to settle businesses with fists, but the Bar Bastards never showed up in the Tube. Red offered a hundred bucks if the BBB duo will meet him face to face, but there was no answer. Even when he raised the prize to 500 dollars, the Bum Bar Bastards were still afraid that Red will “cut Z’s in each of their cheeks.”
Elmo and Davidson, the two BBBs recorded every call and the tapes became an underground sensation. The tapes are known as the Tube Bar Tapes or the Red Taps and later on were the inspiration for The Simpson’s bartender - Moe Szyslak. If you’re looking for inspiration, the Bastards released the recordings on various CDs and MP3 that are available on their official website and on iTunes.
When you are ready to call the Tube Bar, just log on to Caller ID Faker, put in your number, your fake number and the number you'd wish to prank and hit the button! Visit www.calleridfaker.com and with some inspiration - you get can the phone pranking business to new heights.
About the Author
Mark Etinger is a business strategist at Ajax Union Marketing Ajax Union specializes in Business Development and Internet Marketing
What is red tube, is it bad or good or, just what is it?
I hear people talking about it at school and i want to know what it is!!
It's a porn video site. Enjoy!
